people left their things at my house

This is nobody's fault but mine. i had a blog I was working on yesterday and i didn't save it and my boyfriend just turned off the computer and now it's all gone! i want to cry. I hate trying to recreate what i had and i know i should just let it go and blog about it another day but i just can't.

Passing judgements on people is terrible but we all do it, don't we? I don't think it's a big deal until you act on these judgements and shun certain people because of a first impression without giving them the opportunity to show their true colors. I try my hardest not to be ruled by my judgements. I think I do a pretty good job. For example.. I really don't like girls. I know...wtf... I AM a girl. I have to meet a girl about 5 times until I let down my guard a little bit. Do I have friends that are girls, you ask. I do. I have lots of girl friends. I got the coolest girls New York City has ever seen and i wouldn't give them up for anything and if they were gonna abandon me they probably would have done it when I quit shaving and wearing deodorant but didn't lose my love of tank tops or short skirts. My theory is that at this point in our lives....THE 20'S!!!!! girls have had enough chances to hang out with guys long enough to be cool, be it brothers or friends or whatever. I also judge people based on the amounts of pot they smoke. There's nothing I hate more, not even girls I haven't met 5 times, than a bunch of kids that do nothing productive and are going no where with a lame sense of humor but think they're the shit. GET REAL! Sad to say I had to stop hanging out with a lot of my friends for this reason. It was cool 3 years ago but you're still doing the same shit? I'm no saint but I've got some brag worthy things under my belt.

Basically this is all leading up to one final question.. It's something I've always wondered. I'm kind of fascinated by perception and points of views of others. How do you perceive me? Having read some blogging of mine and that's all i guess. haha. Yesterday as I was walking past FIT three guys sitting on a bench looked at me and said "would you ever date a girl like that?" I don't know if they meant it in a negative way. So what I have short hair, acid wash jeans and doc martens on. I'm much more than that. I like dresses too ;)

i'm gonna close my eyes and make a wish and that wish is that everyone that even glances at this blog will share their thoughts

Big World, Small World

I haven't updated in a couple of days... I think.. and I rationalized that by telling myself that nothing has happened but I suppose that's when you know a real blogger from a pretend blogger and I know who I want to be. I want to be a real bloggers. I got an email the other day from a girl I've only heard about. It was very sweet. She mentioned that she's moving back to NY and that we know a bunch of the same people and we might as well start being friends now. Something along those lines. The funny part is... the people she mentioned are my friends from outside NYC. They're all from Warwick..for the most part and that's pretty funny that out of all the people I know here Warwick is our main connection. One of the kids from the Wick that she mentioned was Tista. One of the best people I ever had the pleasure of knowing. He took his own life not too long ago and I feel he's with me every day saying funny shit and "filming" things. After watching a rather touching episode of Battlestar Galactica last night I realized, thanks to Tyrol, that I don't want to give people credit for shit just because they're dead and I want to assure you that I'm not. Tista had his flaws and we all do. He made up for them in big ways until... He was probably the only one that didn't know how much love the world had for him and how affected people are by his absence. Some friendships grew stronger while others collapsed. I remember on my way to the wake I was joking around and laughing with my friends but as soon as I got there I started crying hysterically, quivering lip and all. Losing total control of your body is a crazy thing. I can feel that thinking about all this is bringing me into the topic of love so.. get excited.

Luv ya tist!

NOT MY FRIEND!

Sunday turned into sad goodbyes. Why does the fun ever have to stop? Its almost like those times when I was on mushies and I kept thinking WHY CAN'T I BE HAPPY LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME?! Now I know I can't even be happy like that with the help of the mushies. I only wish my apartment was bigger....loftier if I may. I feel so bad for all the bands that were going to play on Saturday. I really hope that lots of people who were trying to see the show still showed up at the venue. The Viennagram is always down to play shows on weekends in New York, so if you'd like to have them at your venue just ask!

I know... I know, I'm still on the topic of this b*tch brawl in the middle of the East Village on Saturday but just to sum it all up, NOT MY FRIEND. I personally find that girls don't hang out together unless they actually really like each other so if you attack a girl in a group you'd better watch out because there will be fists and claws flying before you can get in another word. I don't care how big of a b*tch my friend might be or how innocent your stupid comment may have been...

On a lighter note, last night my boyfriend and I went to rent Battlestar Galactica, yes, I'm a geek, got in bed with our food ready to stuff our faces and bring the weekend to a close with a cuddle only to find that we had the wrong disk so we had to get up and do it all again. Was it worth it? You bet.

Evidence

So here are two pictures documenting the damage done by these girls on NYC Fight Night.

I have recently found out that those girls were friends and possibly the roommates of the kind of girlfriend of one of the Viennagram band members. I'm really irritated because I tried to fight fair using my fists and whatever but all these girls wanted to do was scratch and pull my hair. One of them bite me. It was stupid. There was no 2nd Viennagram show the following night because the venue, known as THE CHURCH, kept changing shit around without telling the bands and then finally completely pulled out last minute when everyone was already here from Providence. If you're ever thinking about playing a show there, do reconsider because you WILL get screwed over.